They say there is no pain greater than childbirth. As I became older and my parents talked of my marriage, this became my greatest fear. Anything related to this would make me faint. Two women talking about their experiences (and women LOVE talking about their experiences) would make me feel sick.
I saw my elder sister suffer from a miscarriage. When I saw her bleeding I threw up and almost fainted. It was extremely embarrassing that my family had to console me along with my sister, when I, as her only sister should have been the one doing the consoling.
When I got married I did not as is usually the case become pregnant immediately. I suffered from two early miscarriages and had to go through some treatment.
I remember once I was watching a movie with my husband and there was an explicit scene of a woman going through a difficult birth. As I watched, I started blanking out. I think I was out for a good few minutes and while my husband was calling out to me, I could hear him but couldn’t reply. Another embarrassing episode!
After six years of marriage I was pregnant again and things were progressing well. Still fear of the D-day lingered. In my family all the births (all 6 of them) have taken place by operation. So seeing the family history and my own history of falling apart at the mere thought of childbirth, everyone assumed I would simply have an operation and avoid going through the trauma of labor pains and natural delivery.
But my doctor was determined that I have a natural delivery. The position of the baby was correct and there was no need to have an operation.
And so it happened that my due date passed and I had to be induced. I went through a natural delivery and I was really blessed to have a relatively easy time of it. While being stitched up I was calling up my husband and mother-in-law to tell them that the child had been born! Later my doctor thanked me for not screaming while delivering! She also told me that it was hospital policy to stop the epidural later during the delivery which they had done without my knowledge.
When my brother who at the time was a doctor in the same hospital came to see me after the birth I was sitting on the chair looking quite fresh. He was amazed that his frail little sister had been so brave.
But I cannot take any credit for being brave. It really is God’s blessings that help you through.
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