Quality, not Quantity

What question do you hate to be asked? Why?

Whenever I meet someone new and I tell them that I have one son who is 5 years old, they will almost always respond with

“Shouldn’t you be thinking of another one?”,

“You’ve waited too long for your second!”

“When will you have the second?”.

Please, people, children are not found in supermarkets that you just go out and get one. Anyway who made you in charge of how many children I should or should not be having. Maybe I’m just happy with one. And why do I have to explain why I haven’t had another one so far?

I didn’t get Nadir till 6 years of my marriage. During those years I would often be having a conversation like this:

“How many children do you have?”

“None, as yet.”

“Really, how long have you been married?”

“A few years.”

“Are you getting treatment?”

Come on, can’t you just mind your own business!!

Unfortunately in many cultures, a married woman’s success is measured in how many children she produces. Shouldn’t we be looking at what the woman contributes to society as a whole, not just by the number of offspring. And if she has children, then we should measure her success by how well she manages to raise them not by how many she produces.

I for one, believe in quality, not quantity.



11 thoughts on “Quality, not Quantity

  1. I can fully understand. In my case it is, you have two daughters, isn’t it time to think of a son- as if children can be bought from supermarkets !! as you so rightly put it.

  2. People as us (me and my husband) “why don’t you have kids yet??” or “you should have kids by this time!” as if it was intentional! some people jump to conclusions. Judgemental, if I may say.

  3. lol…i have a 2 yr old n i ve been hearing this from when he wasn’t even one…hahaha… lol
    its funny how some ppl have all the time in the world to care about someone else’s life/decisions where they could spent it improving their life…

  4. Well said Ma’am. I totally agree with your argument and I resent so much some people’s twisted attitude when they interfere into others’ choices and affairs.

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